You read “Through His Webcam, Boy Joins a Sordid Online World, and you get really freaking creeped out about what can happen to kids connected to creepy adults through the internet.
Then you can read something like The Big Al Ramos story and realize that you don’t need the internet and webcams for creepy adults to do horrible things to children. The Catholic Church heirarchy is just as effective a tool of molestation, and I’m sure there are many, many others.
There are some really insane child porn laws out there (e.g. if someone sends you child porn in email and you don’t open it, you’re still guilty because it was on your computer), and I’ve generally thought they were stupid, and well, I still do, but I can sure understand the motivation for them with investigators finding this kind of stuff happening.
So how *do* you protect your kids? Best first step I can think of to start off with is do your damndest to make sure your kids aren’t afraid to tell you anything, no matter what. Another is to give your kids the respect that you expect them to demand from other adults. Any other ideas?
None that won’t make me sound like a child abuser in this day and age, unfortunately. Which I think is part of the problem. Hippies have children, now, and they’re raising them the way they wish they were raised themselves. And it’s not working.
You can’t leave kids to their own devices. Especially not on Teh Intarweb. Kids need direction. Kids need guidance. Don’t turn them loose and let them do whatever the hell they want, just because they want it. Don’t give your kids everything they want, but *do* give them everything they need.
It’s not a “phase they’re going through”, it’s something you need to smack them for. And I know others have said this better, but when I was a kid, I had ADHD, and the cure was my dad smacking me upside the head, and saying, “Pay attention!”
Warn your kids; teach your kids; don’t put up with any shit from them. Stop trying to be your kid’s friend. If they don’t respect you as a parent, you’ve screwed them up for life. I’ll leave it as an intellectual exercise for the reader to figure out why; mainly because I’ve blabbed long enough.
Ed, I think the two you mentioned are the foundation for pretty much everything in raising kids. After that, it’s just making lisence plates.
I have kids that use computers. Molly just turned 6 and has been using a computer (on the internet) for 2 years already. Sophi just turned 4 and has been using it for a year now.
At this point they don’t use anything but noggin.com, but they know that the computer talks to other computers, and that they have to ask before doing anything new.
And they know that there are “bad people” out there. When Molly was 3 or so, we explained to her that someday someone might try to take her from us at the store or something, and she needs to yell and scream if that happens. On day at the store we were near some guy, and as we walked away Molly said (loudly) “Look mom! That man didn’t take me!” We informed her that not ALL people are going to try to take her, and that we don’t comment on that fact with every single person we meet. :)